Let Your Love Be Blind

?Is love really blind?? I wonder. Having been happily married (and some of the times not so happily) for 30 years, I cannot help but ask myself more frequently whether my love is blind. Unsurprisingly to myself, the answer seems to be affirmative. How else would I have been able to go through the various difficult times in our relationship? Logic would dictate that we would have broken up by now. The next question I have been asking is whether it had been good that my love is blind.

I found an interesting section in the book ?An Introduction to Positive Psychology? by WC Compton with the title ?Is Love Really Blind??. What you will find in the rest of the article is based on what Compton wrote together with my thoughts.

In our minds, very often, we have pictures of our partners that are inaccurate. We have what is called ?positive romantic illusions? about our partners. These illusions explain why we are oblivious to the faults of our partners and so enamoured of them.

While it is true that these illusions tend to fade with time, it is also true they can also strengthen with times, albeit with different characteristics.

In the former, when marital problems surface, and if the illusions disappear completely, it might lead to eventual marital breakup. Fortunately, most of the times, the illusions might weaken but do not disappear completely. The remnant illusions might help to weather the storms in the relationships.

In the latter case, the marriage might stay strong even though there may be many situations and incidents that might wreck a weaker relationship. We might even increase our willingness to accept many apparent faults and mistakes, and even idiosyncrasies, of our partners. Let us examine why this happens.

It has been found that couples who idealized their partner?s attributes, or had exaggerated beliefs about their control over the relationship, or were overly optimistic about the future of their relationship, were happier. Their relationships were also more stable and lasted longer.

These observations lead me to draw the following inferences/conclusions:

It is through the positive romantic illusions about our partners that explain why we choose our partners and not someone else.

The positive romantic illusions about our partner help us to stick to our partner even during bad times and under otherwise unfavourable conditions. We might continue to deliberately keep a biased positive view of our partner so as to maintain, or even enhance, the relationship.

There is mutual enhancement of the positive romantic illusions that partners have for each other.

People are more committed to spouses who see them in positive light. However, should the stress present in the couple?s life lead to strains in the relationship, the positive romantic illusions might begin to fall apart, leading each partner to realize they have been fooling themselves about the qualities of their partners. Without the presence of the positive romantic illusions, the relationship can then deteriorate very rapidly.

Overall then, it is good for couples to maintain the positive romantic illusions they have. This way, they will remain ?in love? and continue to experience all the joys of romantic love.

References: www.succezz.com/StresstheSilentKiller.html www.succezz.com/How2BHappy.html www.succezz.com/S2/7WaystoLiveLiftotheMax2.html

Jacob Gan PhD (Michigan) has more than 20 years of teaching experience in a university after 8 years of business/industrial experience. He writes for http://www.succezz.com/, http://www.JacobGan.com/, http://www.JacobEducation.com/ and http://www.JacobLearning.com/. He hosts jacob.theelearningcentre.com

Here are some other great websites
Check out my blog.
Online Budget Travel
Music Downloads Ringtones
Mesothelioma Lawyers
Cocaine rehab help
Buy domain name.
Badcredit equity loans
Consolidate loans
American ads
Banking Loans
Mortgage Lenders
Mortgage Lender
NewYork ManHattan Real Estate
BioMass Ethanol
Global Warming Crisis
Asset buyer
Car Sales
Casino Odds?
Cellulosic BioMass Ethanol
Cosmetic Surgery
Country and Western music
Climate change Data
Creditcard applications Online
Movie Stars go Cruisazy
Crystal Meth Rehab
The best Dating Service
DNA Computing
Doctor South Carolina
Digital Video Broadcast
Eating Disorders help
E coli Bacteria
Exotic Spas
Fort Collins FSBO
Game anywhere.
Get your GameDrink on.
Gate keeping media
Global-Climate-Change info
Green America
Guarantee Rates
Green California
Green Data
Green Enviroment
Green fertilizer
Green Mobiles
Green Texas
Green Towns
Macau Casino
Macau Casinos
Mediterranean Cusine
Memphis Tennessee Apartments
Memphis Tennessee Bank
Memphis Tennessee Banks
Memphis Tennessee Loans
Memphis Wireless
Meth Rehab help
Methyltetrahydrofuran fuel.
Mini Widgets
Mobi Cash
Mobi cash
Lowest price drugs online.
Hot Property–Web domain names
“Making money from domain names”
“Where have all the good domain names gone”
“MySpace “Hot property–Web domain names””
Eon’s “Making money from domain names”

Fun Shop Memphis

This Site Is For Sale

Related Articles:

How To Make Your First Date Unforgettable
The first date always remains special to any person. It?s a long-cherished dream coming true. Obviously, everybody will love to make it truly memorable. So, if you don?t want to mess up things and play your cards well, just go through our tips.

Dating For What?
The word dating is derived from ?date?. When they word ?date? is uttered among youth it implies to much more than the date as a chronological reference to time in terms of time as we know and the calendar we follow. For the youth it means an appointment with a friend of opposite for an evening or night out.

Couples – Learn to Work Together to Solve Problems
Q. There has to be some way around the continuing battle in our marriage.

Are You Hooked On Love?
When you’re in love your eyes and your face light up. And so do four tiny portions of your brain.

Enhanced Houston Dating Online
There are a number of ways to enhance your Houston dating experience, and chief among these is to fight your urge to resort to the ?dinner and a movie? standby date. Many of us fall into this trap because its simple, relatively affordable, and, best of all, it requires little to no forethought.

60 Words and Phrases that Make Men Fall Deeper in Love
The interesting thing about getting the love you deserve is that you have a great deal of influence in the kind of love you get. Most times, the love one gets is a function of the kind of love one gives.

To My Friend, With Love
All is still; all quiet; The world seems to be at peace. My soul is singing its rhythmic melody And I’m led like in a trance to write its tunes.

I Love Italian Wine and Food – Aosta Valley Region, Piedmont Wine
If you are looking for fine Italian wine and food, consider the Aosta Valley region of northern Italy. You may find a bargain, and I hope that you?ll have fun on this fact-filled wine education tour.

Why People Love Limousines
Have you ever dreamed to be like those actors and actresses who were being driven around in a stretch limousine? Do you feel like doing it as well?

What Does Unconditional Love Really Mean?
Unconditional love means unconditional freedom. Love and freedom are two of those words that are interchangeable.

How Much Do You Love Me?

Outskirts Press, Inc. has Published Resurrection by Donald D. Warner, which is the Author’s Most Recent Book to Date
Outskirts Press, Inc. has published Resurrection by Donald D. Warner, which is the author’s most recent book to date. The 5 x 8 Paperback in the Autobiography category is available worldwide on book retailer websites such as Amazon and Barnes & Noble for a suggested retail price of $19.95. The webpage at www.outskirtspress.com/resurrection was launched simultaneously with the book’s publication.

New Opinion Poll Benchmarks the State of Online Dating
Market research report finds heavy participation in online dating: many looking, some leaping.

Home Designers Love Interactive Online Catalogs
Paris Texas Hardware and Quarry GBI choose Preface8 eCatalog to showcase their product catalog. Online traffic boosted 200% and users are staying 5 times longer than before.

Romance and Travel Not Just For Kate and Cameron — Home Exchange Members Tell Their Real Life Versions of ‘The Holiday’
Have you ever house swapped? Cameron Diaz and Kate Winslet have. In Sony’s newly released, ‘The Holiday’ Kate and Cameron play two lovelorn women who agree to swap homes for the holidays, and in doing so, land themselves in new digs with new men. But this isn’t just another sweetly crafted Hollywood confection. A growing number of intrepid travelers have taken to house swapping as a cozy alternative to the mini bar and room service tab. And more than one ‘swapper’ has landed herself in a true-life romance. Many of these travel related trysts began at the The Digsville Home Exchange Club and we have their stories.